1. |
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I lay in my bed and stare up at the ceiling
The contents of my mind laid out in front of me
Your face is contained in the mix
I frantically search for a way to fix my head
But all bets are off once I fall asleep
Nothing will ever stand in my way
It repeats itself so many times
I find it comforting
To know I'm alone in this
Along with everyone else
And there's nothing you can say
That will save us from ourselves
The only thing I hate more than being alone
Is myself
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2. |
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The universe called my bluff and now I'm fucked
I'm sick and tired, I've had enough
I want to go back to when I was young
Free from the responsibility that's sucking the life out of me
I'm finding it hard to breathe underneath
Everything that I can't believe or see
Trust me when I say that
It really fucking sucks to be me
Today was the last day of the rest of my life
And I want to die, I want to die, I want to die, I hope I die
I want to die, I want to die, I want to die, I want to fucking die
*I took a cue from my [siblings] to get the hell out of dodge
*A better set up at home, but my heart's thick in the fog
*I know I don't want a phone or machine, or you calling me
*I want to stay gone, and witness you all suffer from this disease
*Scrap the digital cameras and then put seeds in your planters
*Create something more hopeful than what I read on your wall
*I've got a fond thing for a natural human bonding
*But this other form of mankind is nothing I would buy into
*Verse taken from Drawn To Isolation by The Stupid Stupid Henchmen
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3. |
Faith In-Humanity
02:25
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I lost my faith in humanity
I lost my faith in fucking everything
And don't tell me that I don't understand
Because I've fine-tuned my reasoning and comprehension
So point your finger in another direction
I won't take the blame for someone else's decision
The reason behind why I feel this way
About the world's sad state of affairs
It can only go on for so long
Before we all end up in this hole that we've dug for ourselves
It's really none of my concern, since I've already come to terms
With enduring hell as consequence of guilt by association with the human race
I lost my patience for intolerance
These days, the tolerant are just as intolerable
I often wonder where it all went wrong
Making both sides of the argument completely unbearable
But I keep moving forward, despite the negative attention
Hoping that one day this shit will just end
Leaving us with just the right balance
Of being loved and fucking off
I lost my faith in humanity
But it's hard to say if I had any faith in the first place
It comes and goes like a bad case of herpes
That breaks out on my face, I lean in for a kiss
You slap me and I immediately awake
To the realization that everything I thought was just a dream
Now I'm stuck with this idea that life is just shit
And I should wait for the happiest moment
When I'm fucking done with it
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4. |
Losing My Grip
02:03
|
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I could've sworn my grip would've never slipped
But now we're both eating shit, pretending it never happened
Not to sound too cynical
But I hate everything, everywhere, all the time
And this song is just another thing on the never-ending list
Of things that I regret doing in my life
We had the chance, we blew it
We fucked up and we knew it
The time that was lost is never coming back
We were aware, refusing
To attempt, confusing these feelings
With death lending us it's helping hand
I've tried my best but I'm still the worst
I can't quite find the words
To say to make everything okay
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5. |
Anger & Depression
02:02
|
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I know I drink too much
And I say things that I shouldn't much
And I do things that contradict my very existence
I think I've lost touch
With the world, which isn't saying much
With the ones I love, I've had enough
Of the bullshit games and fucking up
I need to take responsibility
But I know I won't
Because this anger and depression
Has rolled itself into a nice, neat, little ball
And taken residence
Inside my heart and inside my head
I'm starting to think that there's nothing I can do about it
Because this anger and depression
Comes and goes as it pleases
I don't know if you exist, but I'm asking you, Jesus
Can you lend me a hand, get this out of my head
I promise to cherish life and stop praying for death
I've used alcohol as a crutch
It's starting to break under the weight, I don't think it'll take much more
Before I end up on the floor, trampled by the anxiety
Of facing my feelings and fears in sobriety
And to make matters worse, I feel that I have been cursed
With the helping hand of the unseen, of the unheard
That's keeping me alive, despite my feelings that I have inside
Of my surroundings and everything that's causing
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6. |
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Awkward situations followed by awkward hugs
And these bullshit conversations take what little air is left inside my
Nothing but I'm writing like I've had too much to drink
Letting go of what we’ve lost, come to terms with how you think of me
And I love what you’ve done
You've cut off ties, you turned and run
You built me up to take your fall
You led us straight into a wall
And I'll say I personally think its too cold to have the windows open
But you wanna smoke your menthol cigarette
And I personally think its too cold to have the windows open
But you wanna smoke your menthol cigarette
You might be leading now but there is no way you could ever win
When you have absolutely no control over any of the situations that you put yourself in
And I wish I could pretend to be
All of the things you think you see in me
But I am not that guy, that guy just left
He had his collar up and there was smoke on his breath
And we have these parties for the way it was
But once the booze is gone is it worth the buzz?
Because I've got some problems and I'm talking loud
And all your friends are here so word will get out
That I personally think its too cold to have the windows open
But you wanna smoke your menthol cigarettes
And I personally think its too cold to have the windows open
But you wanna smoke your menthol cigarettes
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